SELLER OF LOCAL STUFF, HATER OF CAPITALIZATION >>>

It's no secret that in order to associate the name "Steph DeRosa" with the term "journalism" you must do so in a very sarcastic manner - but this time I had some legitimate investigative journalism to partake in: sweet pea had welcomed a new store, fly boutique (just like the name sweet pea, it's not capitalized), inside the store he proudly operates - King's Books. I needed to get the skinny.   

I channeled Sherlock Holmes as I strapped on my plaid deerstalker and grabbed my oversized magnifying glass and pipe. Leave it to me, Tacoma, and I will give you more fluffed information than you ever wanted.

During my investigation I learned Jennifer Adams, owner of fly boutique, had not long ago opened her store on Broadway in downtown Tacoma. It was filled with items from local designers and artists. Call it a brick-and-mortar Etsy, if you will. (Except, without all the made-in-China bullshit etsy.com sells now that they call "handmade," right? ... But I digress.)

Shortly after opening, however, fly boutique succumbed to light water and smoke damage due to a fire at the neighboring Subway sandwich shop.  I suspect this happened because either sweet pea struck one of those long fireplace matches at Subway due to his hatred for bologna meats, or, in a drunken stupor, Bandito Betty tried to take up smoking only to violently gag and haphazardly throw her nasty Virginia Slim in the general direction of a competitor's stack of papers laying outside Subway's doors. Hehe - that would be funny if it really did happen.

Next I visited the new (and smoke-free!) location of fly boutique located inside King's Books' rare book room. (Note: Even if fly isn't open, someone from King's Books will let you in to shop.) Just as I had suspected, the distinct smell of witty sarcasm, letterpress ink and hand-sewn garments permeated my nostrils as I entered the room. I giggled to myself when I saw the handmade Hanukkah postcard that read "What did JEW do on December 25th?" Next I spotted a child's onesie with "Hug Life" screen printed on the front. Clever.

Of course, I couldn't help but recognize an item I owned myself: One of local artist Jenny Craig's flying genitalia charms. Hey, for $5 each, they make amazing gifts.

My investigative eyes led me to the sign posted upon fly's door. It said: Open until January 15, 2011. Say what? Sweet pea tells me to stay tuned for more information, but something tells me even he has no idea what will go in that spot next. 

I suppose this will call for more Steph DeRosa investigative journalism come January 15, 2011. 

Now you can't say I didn't warn you.