BRING ON THE WEEKEND >>>

A funny thing happened to me last week shortly after publishing the weekly Prefunk. Really, I'm surprised it took so long.

To surmise, it was a comment, and it went something like this:

"What the fuck is this column all about?"

It's a good question, and one I've asked myself on more than one occasion.

The nuts and bolts of it are somewhat elementary: You're probably familiar with the age old tradition of "Prefunking" - or the act of priming your mind, body and soul for an exciting event, party, concert or whatever. Usually, Prefunking involves drinks before a show, beers before inner-tubing, or a heater in my back yard before stepping inside to write drivel like "Prefunk."

Anyway, the idea of this column goes from there. Every Friday I choose two events happening this weekend, and then suggest unique and typically chemically dependent ways to prime yourself for them. That's all there is to it.

Oh, and I typically attach pictures of dogs drinking beers - because I'm strange, and the Internet is strangely full of them.

Now, there are bigger questions within: "What the fuck is this column all about?" Like, for instance, why I'd want to attach my name to something like recommending people take whip-its before seeing Kry at The Swiss.

Those are questions for another day.

Until then, you're weekly Prefunk.

SATURDAY, FEB. 20

Sweet Kiss Momma at The Silo in Sumner

The Silo in Sumner is the same fine establishment that brought us "The Sexiest Bra" competition. On Saturday the bar ups the ante by bringing back OG Puyallup band Sweet Kiss Mama - and the Southern Fried P-Town valley rock should fit right in. If you've got enough gas in the old pickup, Saturday night just might be right for a trip to Sumner. It's a SXSW send off party for Sweet Kiss Momma.

PREFUNK: How should one prepare for a trip to Sumner? It's tough to say, exactly, except that a roll of Copenhagen short cut is probably in the cards, and it'll probably require boots you don't mind getting chicken shit on. Before heading to the Silo, brush up with this year's Farmer's Almanac so as to be able to discuss the planting of crops, and be sure to adherer a sticker of Calvin pissing on something to your vehicle. In a pinch, bikini girl mud-flaps will do.

SUNDAY, FEB. 21

Barstool Bingo at Flying Boots Restaurant

Flying Boots Restaurant is a Tacoma icon. Back in the day, I remember trips to the quintessential Grit City greasy spoon for breakfast, where my dad always ordered the S.O.S. It looked like hell, but he loved it. Then again, he was raised on Depression Era inspired cuisine.

Plus, he could always get a beer. Even with breakfast.

Since bingo and barstools go together like Flying Boots and functional alcoholism, it's tough not to recommend this weekly get together for your Sunday evening.

PREFUNK: High octane booze. Plain and simple. I recommend something with a dog in the name or on the can.

The only problem is, of course, Flying Boots is located in one of Tacoma's Alcohol Impact areas - meaning city officials have made it next to impossible to obtain the cheap powerful stuff in the area's corner stores and mini-marts.

The only rationale thing to do, of course, is move your Prefunk public consumption of cheap, high alcohol content booze to a nicer neighborhood before heading to Flying Boots. It just makes sense, right? Move where the booze is. You won't be the first.

With that, I'll see you next week.