SANTA SAYS >>>>

Ah, New Year's Day in Tacoma. Layering of woolens, drabbest down or brightest fleece begin to muffle forms and features. The back of the closet comes to the front; here's the Siberian yakwear. Gortex crests featureless bulk.

With temps hovering in the hi-30s and lo-40s, automobiles splash toward Point Defiance Park. The dude on the Schwinn pedals furiously down Pearl Street toward the zoo. What do intricate piercings feel like in the cold?

There's a crowd at the Point Defiance Marina. Everyone grips towels. Look! There's a frosted cueball, vanity tempting hypothermic harm. A bald man goes hatless. It's silly here.

Youngsters are separated from families at 11:30 a.m. A few are dressed as Batman. There's a Nina Turtle. A grown-up gives a speech. The youngsters cheer and run into the icy cold Commencement Bay. A mom stands in front of blue-colored children like Mary Tyler Moore after she's tossed her tam-o'-shanter. Look upward, she's lost her scarf, it's caught in the cold wind, the scarf flies, dervishing aloft on the updraft, higher still, unfettered ribbon above that neck, beyond reach, a second or three from its watery fate in front of the Tacoma Yacht Club.

The kids run toward shore screaming. One Batman is crying. The Ninja Turtle lost his shell. The children are rewarded with clothing, food and pats on the heads.

Teens and grown-ups inch toward the water. Surprising, there's another Batman. Mr. Speechmaker is back. The clock strike noon and it's into the water for these loons. A few turn back. Most turn blue. Spectators cheer.

Afterward, hot drinks are consumed in tents with heaters.

See you there.

[Point Defiance Marina, Polar Bear Plunge, Sunday, Jan. 1, 11:30 a.m., free, 5912 N. Waterfront Dr., Point Defiance Park, Tacoma, 253.591.5325]

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

There are many differences between the New Year's celebrations of New York City and Tacoma, the most telling of which is the trajectory of each ball. In New York, the ball drops - another year down the tubes. In Tacoma, however, the ball is set on fire.           

"We're really stepping up the fire aspect to mitigate the cold," First Night Tacoma co-producer Lance Kagey told the Weekly Volcano. "Last year, we had Zen fire gardens, which are very cool basins filled with black sand. You can draw in them with sticks and fire traces your drawing. We'll have those again. We'll have some fires to gather around for warmth. We have a big fire spectacular at the end of the night, and lots of fire performers throughout the evening."

As in years past a parade kicks off Tacoma's First Night 2012 nighttimeNew Year's Eve celebration in downtown Tacoma. And this year isn't any different. Beginning at 6:30 p.m. the "World's Shortest Parade" will march from the Graffiti Garages to the Theatre on the Square featuring representatives from the Dockyard Derby Dames, fire dancers, Metro Arts Dragon team and many more.

Of course, the World's Shortest Parade is only a beginning. A First Night Tacoma button will allow you access to 20 different stages and the museums, offering a wide variety of entertainment options. The annual, all-ages, family-friendly, alcohol-free New Year's Eve celebration follows the Chinese lunar calendar, and this year is the year of the dragon. In this spirit there will be two large dragons making an appearance at the festival - a 35-foot creation by Metro Parks Tacoma, and a 14-foot fire-breathing metal beast.

The entertainment schedule for the night blows my mind. Check out the schedule here.

First Night Buttons are only $10 before the festival begins. The buttons make the perfect gift. Click here to discover where you can grab one or 20.

So if you're just glad 2011 is over, stay at home and join Carson Daly and Justin Bieber in Times Square as they watch the ball drop. If you're excited to get started with 2012, head to downtown Tacoma, where the ball, and spirits, will be on fire.

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

There's no better way to support your community than supporting your neighbors in need, especially during the holiday season.

The Weekly Volcano has partnered with the United Way of Pierce County on a 12-month campaign focused on the issue of homelessness and affordable housing. The weekly rag will be highlighting community efforts around the issue and helping raise funds to go directly toward affordable housing.

Today on its blog, Spew, the Volcano highlights Salvation Army Tacoma's efforts to keep homeless families together. The Salvation Army's family housing program in Tacoma has been providing emergency housing, improvement of life skills and assisting families and single women with securing permanent housing since 1983. Read the feature story here, and then give the karmic wheel a spin.

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

PLUS: 2011 Best of Olympia Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

SANTA SAYS >>>>

There are some hobbies better kept to yourself. You know, the ones you do alone in your castle late at night. And then there are some truly cool hobbies, like model railroads. These should be celebrated and dragged out in the open for all to admire. Which is why the 16th Annual Model Train Festival, downtown Tacoma's biggest model railroad exposition (taking into account, of course, the relatively small size of the subjects at hand because they are, of course, models), is being held Dec. 26-Jan. 1, instead of like, a half-hour. This gives you plenty of time to enjoy every floor of the Washington State History Museum filled with operating modular layouts.

These local clubs are providing model train layouts: 4D PNR HO Modular Group, 4D NTRAK Group, Mount Rainier N-Scale, Pierce County Lionel Club, Tacoma Northwestern Model Railroad Club, and Boeing Employees Model Railroad Club. Plus, the Puget Sound Model Railroad Engineers will be on hand to operate their masterpiece-the largest permanent model railroad layout in the state. Washington Operation Lifesaver, a program dedicated to preventing and reducing accidents at highway-rail grade crossings, will have an information booth set up at the event.

But remember to look both ways before crossing, and keep your pennies to yourself. 

[Washington State History Museum, Monday, Dec. 26-Jan. 1, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. $6-$8, 1911 Pacific Ave., Tacoma, 253.272. 9747]

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

Whoa. Stop, take a deep breath, and put down the biscotti you've just sharpened into a stake. You are not alone. There is help. There is GRINCH.

Great Resources In Nourishing Calming Holidays was established in 1976, when a Pres. Gerald Ford loyalist found he was simply unable to squeeze out any seasonal goodwill; empty-handed on Christmas Eve, he made the nimrod decision to set the Christmas tree on fire instead of admitting that he hadn't done any shopping. His ex-wife, homeless, with the divorce settlement she received in early 1977, went on to found GRINCH, determined that no one else's Christmas should go up in smoke.

Though there are no official GRINCH chapters in the South Sound, Santa found a copy of THE GRINCH 13-Step Guide to Getting in the Spirit in Yukon Cornelius's Silver and Gold Market. And there it was. Number 9: "Embrace the Winter Solstice by covering your house in suns and moons and swath the lintels with fir boughs because they smell good and will relive stress through atmospheric control." It also said to shed your clothes and run around naked in the hedges made of brambles and white thorne.

It works, except the naked thing. The fragrance washes away the frosted glassy shiny tinselly stress.

If you want to take Number 9 to the next level, attend the annual Tacoma Winter Solstice and Candle Shriving Celebration Wednesday, Dec. 21 at the Mandolin Café. Open to the public, Goddess Chiara Wood will help bring you to center, wash away the bad and look toward the positive – then feed the hell out of you with a righteous four-course dinner and live music by Paddy Coyne's Irish Session Band.

Santa suggests your partake in the naked thing on your own property.

[The Mandolin Café, Winter Solstice and Candle Shriving Celebration, Wednesday, Dec. 21, 6-9 p.m., 18+, $25 advance tickets at brownpapertickets.com, 3923 S. 12^th St., Tacoma, 253.761.3482, themandolincafe.com]

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

It was a sad day for North Pole farmers when it was announced several months ago that Mother Nature would be shutting down her pilot compost collection program because of the budget crunch.

The test program, in which 121 igloos had their food scraps and other organic waste regularly collected by the Pole via green versions of the Pole's curbside recycling carts, had been going strong for a while thanks to donations from the Miser brothers and Burgermeister Meisterburger. The three chaps aren't all bad.

Looks as if home composting in Thurston County is having better results than up here.

Thurston County Solid Waste and Master Gardener Foundation of Thurston County are teaming up to offer residents the opportunity to purchase the perfect holiday gift - reduced price home compost bins.  There is guaranteed delivery by Christmas Day.

Santa has to run down to the Monster High Toy Division to fix a problem. Read the press release on the home composting bins from the Thurston County Solid Waste Department after the jump:

Read more...

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

When you pick up the paper tomorrow (yes, the Weekly Volcano produces a paper in addition to this amazing blog and ridonkulous website) you'll see the Weekly Volcano's Holiday Guide Four(!) is all about eating, drinking and shopping locally, and that means you should too.

How about a gift certificate?

How about one for Tacoma Art Place?

As you know, Tacoma Art Place is a non-profit 501(c)3 that provides a place for artists of all artistic and financial abilities to tap into their creativity. The Hilltop Tacoma venue engages the community through its classes and community workshops. So ... make gift giving easy this year by supporting your local non-profit arts center and cut down on packaging. Give family and friends Tacoma Art Place memberships. By doing so, you'll be giving 12 months of creativity. Click here for details.

Oh, the awesome Tacoma Art Place has a couple of ornament classes on the books. At 1 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 18, TAP will host a corkaments class. For $15, you will learn how to turn your wine corks into cute ornaments. At 2:30 p.m. on the same day, TAP will teach you how to make cinnamon clay ornaments for a $15 fee. Give TAP a buzz and RSVP.

[Tacoma Art Place, 1116 S. 11th St., Tacoma, 253.238.1006]

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

You might be familiar with Bobble Tiki – the cranky wooden souvenir tiki has written about the South Sound music scene for the Weekly Volcano since the weekly rag launched in 2001. Bobble Tiki writes skewed, highly opinionated music columns - sporadically spell-checked sometime between his morning pedicure/colonic and his heavily medicated regression therapy treatment/wine tasting.  The columns always contain strong language, irony, deadpan humor and occasional pointed remarks about the NBA, Britney and liquid cheese products. The columns are suitable for anyone who loves pleated khakis, pink wine or Meg Ryan movies.

Anyhoo, every year at this time Bobble Tiki promises himself that he's going to act less like Lady Macbeth and more like Ebbey Scrooge - after the graveyard scene, of course - you know, dancing around in a nightshirt making merry, in keeping with the situation. And Bobble Tiki forbids the NBA or those freakin' icicle lights to spoil his attention to goodwill toward men, which Bobble Tiki intends to do Wednesday night during at the Project: U takeover of Cork! Wine Bar.

Project: U, the United Way of Pierce County program run by 20- and 30-somethings, will host a fundraiser and toy drive at the Tacoma wine bar. Cork! has generously agreed to donate 20 percent of all sales proceeds from the evening to the United Way of Pierce County in the fight to improve the lives of all in Pierce County. The new, unwrapped toys collected will be earmarked for United Way's Season of Caring program and the children of Pierce County.

Visit www.project-u.org for more information. 

Drop by Wednesday with a toy or two, sip wine and give some encouraging words to the little tiki in the corner.

[Cork! Wine Bar, Wednesday, Dec. 14, 6-10 p.m., 606 N. State St., Tacoma, 253.212.1492]

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

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SANTA SAYS >>>>

Santa will be honest with you. When he thinks of this time of the year, Danny Bonaduce almost never pops in my mind.

Oh sure, back in January 1994 Donny Osmond and Bonaduce slugged it out in a three-round charity boxing match in Chicago. Bonaduce, theoretically free from the chains of substance abuse, yet still appearing insane, landed many left jabs to the thickly padded head of Osmond. Donny, who looked like he'd been doing "a lot of reading lately," did a decent job of keeping his hands up and did land a couple of silly looking hooks.

Bonaduce won.

Bonaduce is back in thoughts. As you may know Bonaduce has been named the new morning drive host at KZOK FM. His first day on-air was Nov. 14. That's all fine and well, but what's cool is he and his new Seattle radio station will bring holiday cheer to Tacoma Saturday. Alpine Tree and Wreath and Bonaduce will give away free 6-foot Douglas fir Christmas tree to the first 100 active military to stop by Tacoma Dodge Chrysler Jeep Ram, between 11 a.m. and 1 p.m.

For more details, click here.

[Tacoma Dodge Chrysler Jeep Ram, Saturday, Dec. 10, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., 4101 S. Tacoma Way, Tacoma, 877.470.0220]

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

LINK: Santa Says RSS feed

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Give the Weekly Volcano a "LIKE" present

PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

PLUS: 2011 Best of Olympia Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

SANTA SAYS >>>>

There's no better way to support your community than supporting your neighbors in need, especially during the holiday season.

The Weekly Volcano is partnering with the United Way of Pierce County to run a 12-month campaign focused on the issue of homelessness and affordable housing. The weekly rag will be highlighting community efforts around the issue and helping raise funds to go directly toward affordable housing.

Today on its blog, Spew, the Volcano highlights the uphill battle Pierce County Community Connections faces fighting homelessness in today's economic environment. Read the feature story here, and then give the karmic wheel a spin.

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

LINK: Santa Says RSS feed

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Give the Weekly Volcano a "LIKE" present

PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

PLUS: 2011 Best of Olympia Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks