SANTA SAYS >>>>

Ho-ho-holy crap it's cold up here.

Well, friends, my reindeer team, Papa Elf and I are on the clock. Papa Elf is dialed in with the North American Aerospace Defense Command with the weird, kid-friendly website that tracks my toy-delivering flight. You may follow me here.

The Santa NORAD tracking tradition dates back to 1955, when some waif in Colorado Springs dialed a wrong number - misprinted in a local newspaper ad - and ended up talking to an officer at NORAD's predecessor, the Continental Air Defense Command Operations Center. The kid demanded to know where Santa was. The officer improvised. When NORAD opened in 1958, some PR genius figured it was worth carrying on the Santa surveillance.

NORAD uses some high-tech systems to track my sleigh - radar, satellites, Santa Cams and fighter jets - and has teamed up again this year with Google, which began tracking me at 2 a.m. Google Maps will have all the necessary flight information, or you can tune in to a 3-D feed via Google Earth. Parents with eager kids can plot out the exact right time to chill the milk and cool the cookies by using the Google Maps mobile site as well, by searching for "(santa)" on their smartphones.

You can also call NORAD for the latest news of my flight. The NORAD Tracks Santa Operations Center will be open to 5 a.m. on Christmas. Call 1.877.HI.NORAD (1.877.446.6723) toll-free.

Peace out.

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

LINK: Santa Says RSS feed

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

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PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

PLUS: 2011 Best of Olympia Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

SANTA SAYS >>>>

There's nothing worse than awakening from a long winter's nap, rolling out of bed and discovering it's Christmas morning - and not a creature is stirring whiskey into his coffee. But you'd better not cry, and you don't need to pout, because if you plan ahead you'll get your jollies.

All state-run liquor stores will be open from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. on Christmas Eve, Dec. 24. State liquor stores will be closed on Christmas Day, Dec. 25.

Pierce Transit will operate Sunday level of services Christmas Day and Monday, Dec. 26.

After you work your way through the Christmas tree, you can ditch the Claus-induced calories and that extra side of grits at the Franciscan Polar Plaza, which is open Christmas Eve from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. and Christmas Day from noon to 6 p.m. The 40 by 100 square feet of ice is sure to be full of skate crews demonstrating their mad skillz and test-driving their recently unwrapped winter garb.

As the sun starts to sink on Christmas, prepare yourself for an untamed night at ZooLights Tacoma, where thousands of twinkling, animated light sculptures illuminate the nocturnal paths of the animal kingdom. Peddlers offer hot cocoa, while you ride the carousel or camels. ZooLights will not be open Christmas Eve.

PLUS: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

LINK: Santa Says RSS feed

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Give the Weekly Volcano a "LIKE" present

PLUS: 2011 Super Best of Tacoma Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks

PLUS: 2011 Best of Olympia Bought and Sold Readers' and Staff picks